Category: Personal

Yesterday I spent the closing hours of another “too short” weekend catching up on The Dynasty, an Apple TV documentary series of the New England Patriots. Just me and the dog, Mabel, who had zero interest in my enthrallment with Belichick souffléing an 11-5 record without Tom Brady or my elation (yes exhilaration) to hear Brandon Lloyd, Deion Branch, and Wes Welker widen the scope of Aaron Hernandez’s maniac behavior behind the walls of the Patriots organization.

With a freshly made vodkarita in hand… Look I’m not doing footnotes here… I haven’t replaced the Don Julio yet. I refuse anything beneath Don Julio in terms of tequila. Anyways, I’m ready to sip my next libation as Ernie Adams, Patriots Director of Football Research, whatever the fuck that means, takes into the next episode.

“We were looking for toughness and intensity in a football player. In the fourth round, we found this guy that we liked. You know, there was were some off-the-field issues. We thought ‘There’s a degree of risk here, but it makes sense to take it.’ But looking in hindsight, of course, we did not understand the full dimensions of what the problem was.”

“OH SHIT!” I holler out in my buzzed thrill, waking poor Mabel from behind the couch. Is it fucked up to get excited about an Aaron Hernandez episode? Yeah probably, but I can’t help my fascination with problematic millionaires with celebrity, status, and power who murder multiple victims like it’s another Tuesday. The man was unhinged but still managed to play an entire regular season of football, a Super Bowl, and $40 million dollar contract after murdering multiple men in cold blood.

When Brandon Lloyd recalls Wes Welker warning him “Aaron, he’s gonna fondle his genitalia in front of you, he’s gonna talk about bathing with his mom, and you’ve just gotta ignore it” how can you not feel captivated. And yeah Hernandez is as charming as the 6 AM turd I pick from Mabel every morning. Still, that shit always stunk and to hear a new dimension to his depravity only makes everyone involved look even worse. Belichick, Adams, the Krafts, all of the Patriots organization.

Which brings me to Belichick. What the hell is this smear campaign? It’s not just this docu series. There’s an entire media narrative squeeze every ounce of discredit-paste out of the Belichick tube. Like serious, what is the fucking rhetoric “hE nEvEr wOn wItHoUt bRaDy!”

Bill Walsh never won without Joe Montana. Andy Reid never won without Patrick Mahomes. Chuck Noll never won without Terry Bradshaw.

You almost never win without a Hall of Fame quarterback. In the 21st century, only Trent Dilfer, Brad Johnson, Joe Flacco, and Nick Foles will not make it to the Hall of Fame. Eli Manning, Russell Wilson, and Matthew Stafford are borderline guys, but Tom Brady (7x Super Bowls), Ben Roethlisberger (2x), Peyton Manning (2x), Drew Brees, Aaron Rodgers, and Patrick Mahomes (3x) are Hall of Famers.

Yeah, Brady is the greatest. It’s not a debate for me. Mahomes is more talented, clearly, but he’s not even half up Everest yet. This isn’t about those guys. This is about Bob and Jonathan Kraft’s egos. Guys, you want equal credit for the Brady Belichick dynasty? What, because you hired Bill? Because you sign the checks? You didn’t cultivate the greatest NFL dynasty. Those two men did.

No matter how actively those two try to rewrite history and the reform the narrative, those of us who watched for the past two decades plus and give a shit about what happen know greatest sports run in the 21st century started with Belichick, and yes, if not for Brady, there wouldn’t be six Lombardi trophies at 1 Patriot Place.

Who will the Krafts blame when they don’t win another Super Bowl for a decade plus? Will they still blame Bill? Whose fault will it be? I sat there alone in my living room thinking about who they would flick the nickel to. Not a dollar, a nickel, since the Krafts received failing grades from an NFLPA report card in treatment of families, weight room, team travel, and…

D+ in ownership? Bobby you are the owner?!

I’m really looking forward to Belichick coming back for the 2025 season and having a few FUCK YOU seasons with another team. It’ll be fun to listen to all the scribes and hacks do a 180 when he finds success again.

When the thoughts come to their natural conclusion I’m still alone. Speculating about how crazy Hernandez really was or Belichick’s besmirchment on my own. Mabel already back asleep and amnesic about my furor. I’m reminded of Chuck Klosterman’s theory of what history and culture lives on after us.

Those of us who care the most archive and document the information to ensure its record. Those who care the least however determine what will live on past our time on earth.

I worry I’ve become one of those people who care the most (care too much) about things that matter very little to most people, including my wife, friends, and family. Even my dad, who introduced me to football and American sport, could give a shit about Belichick and if he’ll get another job.

To be clear, I care about this individual because I’ve shaped much of professional approach to my career based on how Belichick shaped his culture in New England and his approach to managing a team. I’m far more goofy and willing to share myself with others, but I admire his fearlessness executing decisions in best interest of the organization.

His approach included dispassionate choices of personnel, exploiting the weakness (and stupidity) of opponents, and direct confrontation with players when he delivered coaching.

Matt Cassel shared a bit of coaching from Bill in The Dynasty. “One time, I don’t see a corner blitz, and I get absolutely annihilated, like boom! Belichick comes in and he says, ‘Cassel, can we figure out the corner blitz? Because I don’t want to have to write your mother a letter that says, ‘Dear Mrs. Cassel, we’re sorry to inform you that your son is dead because he’s a dumbass and didn’t see the corner blitz.'”

Remember that NFLPA report card I mentioned earlier? Only 55% of players felt Belichick was efficient with their time and felt he was rarely willing to listen to the locker room. Being demanding in the NFL, or just in life general is just too uncomfortable for “modern” people.

You can try bubble wrapping the world all you want, but life is demanding. It’s not supposed to be easy. Stress, anxiety, confrontation, and discomfort all exist naturally in our world. Avoiding them and hiding in your pantry won’t make them ago away.

Difficult feelings aren’t negative or positive. They’re a natural response to a situation. It’s unfortunate society decays into deeper brittleness. Belichick’s ousting is small in scale but not unimportant in the grand scheme of culture frailty in America. Sadly, I’m the only one I know personally who cares as much or even believes this phenomenon cries out for attention.

Maybe that’s the hardest part about caring. Always has been for me, whether it was small unheralded bands like Roomrunner or overlooked Dragonball Z characters, Gohan from Trunks’ timeline. You push in your own way year after year with your own oratory, but the people in your life don’t really care anymore than the first time they heard your speech. In fact, they just want you to shut up about it finally. At least the dog will stick around and listen

Maybe I’m just bummed I’ve run out of friends willing to listen lay out these ideas over a few beers. I’m 32 and can’t honestly say I can give them the same time I did when I was 22, 25, or 28. I showed my wife Stand By Me for the first time a few weeks ago, and the ending keeps resurfacing in my head. Feels like all these friendships will turn into Chris Chambers. I won’t see them every year or for years, but I know I’ll miss them .

You never have friends later in life like the ones we have in adolescences or in my case before I really became an independent adult.